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Lifestyles are increasingly about pretending and we should be concerned because it’s implications on our leadership effectiveness.
Leadership is the overflow your lifestyle.
Back in 1996, in a speech delivered at Skidmore College, the late cultural critic Susan Sontag warned about this kind of trend. What struck me the most was her specific call out of the
“inherent laziness of consumerism.”
She wasn’t talking about physical laziness, but a deeper, more insidious form—a mental and spiritual passivity.
It’s the seductive idea that “something out there” will magically transform us, bypassing the hard work of genuine growth.
Influencer culture, which is all about deception and misdirection, has led us to believe that progress is less about personal improvement and more about the endless replacement of old wants with new, old things with new, and old achievements with new.
We’re constantly bombarded with cryptic messages about achieving more, doing more, being more.
Though it is status and progress that is being sold, it is superficiality and instant gratification that are being consumed.
This relentless pursuit of “influence and progress” often fueled by the propulsive power of envy leads us down a well-worn path: the path of endless external validation.
But what if this path, paved with the promise of quick fixes and instant upgrades, is actually leading us astray?
I fear that in chasing influence we’re actually becoming increasingly more shallow, distracted, and less capable of engaging in the deep work necessary to achieve meaningful progress.
In this issue, I want to bring your attention to the false promise of influencer culture that is permeating all aspects of life and highlight the detrimental effect it has on how we approach high performance and self-development.
“Winning” Through Appearance
This “inherently lazy consumer” mindset Susan alluded to has become dangerously intertwined with our understanding of “winning.”
We’re led to believe that success is synonymous with acquisition—the bigger house, the bigger following, the more prestigious title, the bigger endorsement, the better deal, the fancier car, the lavish vacations, the acclaimed dining experiences, and the more famous associations.
Our social media feeds are becoming increasingly filled with images and reels designed to depict that we’re #winning.
This translates to an unhealthy focus on outcomes at all costs, often fueled by envy of those perceived to be “just above” oneself.
In college athletics, we see recruiting strategies that prioritize flashy displays of materialism over the ideals of team building and character development.
But this distorted view of winning isn't confined to sports. It seeps into every aspect of our lives, from our careers to our relationships.
We’ve been led to believe that we can easily accumulate our way to happiness, success, and even personal growth.
This is the trap.
We have become so focused on acquiring external markers of success that we are neglecting the internal work that truly fuels progress.
We chase the appearance of winning—the fleeting high of some external thing—without cultivating the qualities that lead to genuine, sustainable progress: awareness, perspective, resilience, courage, discipline, focus, and a commitment to continuous improvement.
Cultivating Authentic Success
Influencer culture thrives on the promise of immediate fulfillment.
We’re constantly bombarded with messages telling us we deserve things, that we can have what we want now.
This isn't to say that the tools and resources being pushed are useless. But they are just that—tools. They are not “must-haves”
They are meant to support our efforts, not replace them.
True progress, whether in sports or in life, comes from within.
It comes from cultivating authentic success—the part of us that embraces challenges, pushes our limits, learns from setbacks, and strives for excellence not just in outcomes, but in the process itself.
This authentic success isn’t defined by what we own, but by who we are.
It’s about embracing the hard work, the dedication, and the unwavering commitment to our goals.
It’s about defining success on our own terms, based on our values and our unique potential.
Susan was right. There is an inherent laziness fostered by a culture that prioritizes
…consumption over creation,
…instant gratification over sustained effort,
…and acquisition over deeper engagement with the world.
Influencer culture is a system that encourages us to be passive followers rather than active leaders, thinkers, or doers.
If left unchecked, it's a cultural condition that can erode our capacity for critical thinking, genuine experience, and meaningful connection with others.
So, let’s ask ourselves:
Are we chasing genuine growth, or are we simply chasing the next shiny object?
Are we building character, or are we just accumulating things?
The answer, I believe, lies in reconnecting with the authentic success within us all—the part that understands that true winning isn't about the gram, but about the grit, the grace, and the unwavering pursuit of our best selves.
That type of progress will always be deeply and personally satisfying.
Now go and show the world what that kind of winning looks like.
I promise you, it will be good and inspiring.
Stay The Course,
