It’s easy to get swept up in the flow. The to-do lists. The calendar full of events. The preparing and planning all year. The spreadsheets, the recruiting databases. It can be numbing if we’re not careful.

No one is suggesting we’re going to enjoy every single aspect of leading. Leadership is difficult. It gets even more difficult when we lose focus on the things that bring us joy and only fix our minds on the things that cause stress, anxiety, and frustration.

One personal trait required for all elite leaders is integrity. It’s the one thing that companies hire for and fire for a lack thereof.

Integrity can’t be bought. It won’t be downloaded with the latest operating system. You can’t borrow someone else’s. It’s carefully crafted through the long haul and can be forfeited in a moment’s notice.

There was a time when you weren’t the one in your chair. You didn’t always hold the title or position you have now. It’s possible to remember a time when you didn’t have the slightest clue what was expected for a role like the one you have now.

If you have been leading for a long period of time you likely have experienced the many ebbs and flows that come with the role. Some of the highest highs and some of the lowest lows. The joy of leading and influencing, coupled with the loneliness of being the decision maker, and the easy target for criticism.

It takes an emotionally resilient person to be a leader. We’re not robots, and we must show some vulnerability to lead, but the truth is the leader carries a burden of “holding it together” when the going gets tough.

It’s hard to find a strong, purposeful, leader who hides from their people.

I was driving the other day and stopped at a red-light. Beautiful weather so I had the windows down. At the intersection a group of construction workers were working hard on a project. A difficult project at that. The kind of work that will callous your hands and sweat your brow. They were in the midst of real struggle. Real work.

Have you ever had a co-worker who was so obviously obsessed with climbing the ladder and “playing the game"? When the boss walks in they sit up straight. They laugh at every important person’s jokes. They put on a show when around “important” people and then their true colors come out around the regulars. They are obsessed with gaining whatever advantage they can. Desperate for the climb, they unfortunately feel when they climb high enough they will be important too.

In the Stay The Course Academy we’ve spent a lot of time focusing on the difference between a transformational leader and a transactional leader. It’s not that all leaders become card-carrying members of one group, but rather that our attitudes and behaviors will fluctuate and flow between the two groups.

There was a time when you weren’t the one in your chair. You didn’t always hold the title or position you have now. It’s possible to remember a time when you didn’t have the slightest clue what was expected for a role like the one you have now.

A truly transformational leader lives a higher standard than the rest of their industry. They not only want to win games if they are a coach. They’re not just wanting to grow profits if they are in business. They won’t just settle for high test scores from their students.

You know you’re living the leadership life when you’ve been criticized and it cut deep. It’s a tough experience for a coach, teacher, principal, pastor or CEO when you take on unfair criticism for doing the things you know need to be done.