If you want to flourish, spend less time worrying about happiness and more time connecting your purpose with your passions, and aligning your intentions with your impact.
Reduce Your Stress By 68% in Just 6 Minutes
It’s no wonder the best leaders I engage with are voracious readers. The saying has always been “leaders are readers.” Perhaps we only focused on the perceived commitment to learning and growing that comes from “leaders are readers.” In reality a hidden benefit may have been the embedded stress relief.
Psychological Richness: The Utility of Unpleasant Experiences
In our relentless pursuit of a good life we’ve become accustomed to labeling unpleasant emotions as negative or bad, because of how they make us feel in the moment. That’s a problem when those “bad things” actually have the capacity to help us make meaningful progress towards our goals and live more intentionally.
Keep It Playful - The Story of Georges St Pierre
A Necessary Inefficiency
Leading The Way Through Conversations
The Way of The Transformational Leader
Why So Serious?
Read Time: 4.5 minutes
Humor has a profound positive impact on our brain chemistry, but as we age we allow our humor to unnecessarily wane.
Back in April I was home watching the kids.
Earlier in the day we were out taking a walk and my 8 year old son asked if we could do a “roast”?
It caught me by surprise, but I was all for it.
Back in the day, I was a jokester so I was eager to see if I still had it.
The next hour or so of our walk was filled with, “your momma is so…”
Your momma is like the sun… big, round, and hard to look at!
Your momma is so trashy… when she stepped out of the uber the driver got fined for littering!
Your momma is do dumb… she tried to use a ruler to measure her sleep!
Your momma is so fat and old… when God said let there be light, he had her to move out of the way!
Now, this went on for over an hour and those 4 jokes represent most of my solid material so the kids had to endure some really bad jokes. Yet, they were still laughing so hard.
I, on the other hand, only laughed a fraction of the time they did.
Why did laughter seem to come so much more natural for them?
Am I losing my sense of humor?
Compared to my teenage years. I laugh like 90% less than I used to.
Are you the same?
This had me curious, so I looked into what happens to our humor as we age and the findings were fascinating.
In this issue, we’ll delve into some interesting humor science and discuss its implications on our overall health and well-being .
Exploring Our Sense Of Humor
Think back to your teenage years. What were some of the funniest moments you can recall?
Chances are when you reflect on those moments they don’t feel as hysterical.
What gives? Do we lose our sense of humor as we age?
Science tells us we start to develop our sense of humor around 4-months old.
What’s crazy is our humor development rate is task dependent. So nonsense, puns, playing with social rules, and tricks all have their own trajectories.
After adolescence, we begin laughing less. Researchers call it the humor cliff!
Our laughter diminishes year over year, until we reach our 80’s then we start to see and uptick.
When we look a little deeper we find that it’s not that our humor diminishes but our taste in humor does.
Ultimately, studies found that as we age we appreciate “self-enhancing humor” more.
Self-enhancing humor is defined as comedy in everyday situations, often by humorously targeting oneself in a good-natured way.
So, it’s not that our humor wanes. We simply don’t put ourselves into enough situations to make light of our realities.
Like all things, humor is a skill. Yes, humor can be trained. It must be trained if we want to cultivate our full potential as leaders.
You might be wondering why?
Well, humor, specifically laughter, positively impacts our health and well-being.
Laugh For The Health Of It
How can we use humor to build resilience and better cope with challenges?
There's a wealth of evidence supporting the idea that humor is good for our health. Here are some of the key benefits that have been discussed in scientific literature:
Stress Reduction: Laughter has been shown to reduce levels of cortisol, the body's primary stress hormone. It also triggers the release of endorphins, our natural feel-good chemicals. This combination can lead to a sense of relaxation and well-being.
Immune System Boost: Some research suggests that laughter might enhance immune system function by increasing the production of antibodies and activating immune cells. While more research is needed, the potential link between humor and immunity is promising.
Pain Management: Laughter's ability to release endorphins can act as a natural painkiller. It can also distract us from pain and create a more positive outlook, making pain more manageable.
Improved Mood: Laughter is a natural mood booster. It can help alleviate symptoms of depression and anxiety and promote a more positive outlook on life.
Enhanced Social Connection: Sharing laughter with others creates a sense of bonding and belonging. Humor can break down barriers and foster stronger relationships.
These are just a few examples of the many ways humor can benefit our health.
By cultivating a sense of humor and incorporating laughter into our lives, we can tap into this powerful tool for well-being.
Lighten Up
We could all benefit from becoming a little less serious and more playful about life.
Here are a few tactics I pulled from the protocols used in the research studies I reviewed.
Identify the nature of your sense of humor. When you have a better appreciation for the things you find humorous you can be more intentional about incorporating them into your life. From Cat Videos to Political Satire to Sport Bloopers the possibilities are endless.
Laugh more. If you’re not laughing on a daily basis, that’s a sign you need to lighten up. Be more mindful of the humor in daily life, learn to laugh at yourself, and practice finding humor in stressful situations.
Improve your ability to tell jokes. Practice creating jokes and telling jokes. Engaging in this process will broaden your humorous perspective.
Humor is a powerful tool that can help high performers optimize their brain function, improve their mood, and enhance their overall well-being.
Incorporating humor into daily life, whether through watching funny movies, reading humorous books, or simply spending time with friends who make you laugh, can have a significant positive impact.
Since doing this research I’ve started to incorporate more humor into my life and I’ve noticed a difference. A considerable difference in my mood.
I’m laughing a lot more. I’m generally more cheerful.
Curious to hear about the positive impacts humor has on you.
P.S. If you have a good “Your Momma” joke, hook your boy up!
My Own Worst Enemy - The Story of Caeleb Dressel and His Inner Critic
Is It Your State or Your Story?
Read Time: 4.5 minutes
I’m coaching my son’s pee wee football team. Seventeen 1st and 2nd graders.
If you’ve ever been around 6-8 year old boys you can imagine how volatile of a situation this can be.
During our last game we found ourselves in a tight one. Midway through the fourth quarter we have the ball holding onto a slim lead 19-14.
You could feel the momentum shifting in favor of the other team.
You know the feeling I’m talking about. Confidence is waning! Heart rate is elevating! Minds are wandering!
We’re in the offensive huddled and I could see this feeling overcoming the boys in real time.
The huddle, which is usually a place of quiet attentiveness, is shifting into an anxious chatterbox.
Nobody is listening. Very few of them are even making eye contact with me.
Trying to regain control, Myself and the assistant coach start exclaiming;
“Get your minds right…”
“Lock in…”
“Get your heads in the game…”
The more we yelled, the worse things seemed to get! Then came the stories;
“You guys don’t listen…”
“What’s wrong with you? You obviously don’t want to be here…”
In that moment I realized we were exposing these kids to the same vicious self-talk cycle that we’ve become accustomed to.
I immediately stopped myself, got loud enough to get everyone's attention and asked them to take a deep breath with me.
One big inhale in through the nose, followed by one big sighing exhale out through the mouth.
Boom! They were locked in.
No more yelling. No more berating. No more threats. No more shaming.
We found ourselves in a state that was conducive for executing the task at hand.
We went on to handle our business and win the game.
This story serves a great reminder of what we’re all dealing with on a day to day basis. Whether personally or as a part of a team.
In this issue, we’ll revisit principles of neuroplasticity, discuss the interplay between our state and our stories, highlighting the roles each has in influencing our performance.
Your Nervous System
The human nervous system is a highly advanced operating system.
A stunningly designed network of neurological hardware capable of anything and responsible for everything.
Equally impressive is its adaptability. Our nervous system is constantly learning from our experiences and updating accordingly.
This phenomenon occurs through a process called neuroplasticity. We’ve discussed this process several times, but it bears repeating because it’s essential to flourishing.
As a reminder, neuroplasticity happens in three fundamental ways.
Strengthening of existing neuron connections
Weakening of existing neuron connections
Addition of new neuron connections
Our neurons can be classified into two types.
Afferent - Neurons that carry information from the body to the mind.
Efferent - Neurons that carry information from the mind to the body.
The nervous system is made up of roughly 80% afferent neurons and 20% efferent neurons.
This is important because it reminds us how important it is to take a whole-person approach to everything we do.
Yet, too often, we limit our options to the mind side of the equation.
We’re constantly trying to “think our way” out of stress!
Heck, I “should know better” and I still tried that with my pee wee football team.
Top-Down | Bottom-Up
There are two ways to go about training our nervous system to boost our resilience and cultivate more calm in our lives.
The most common approach taken is what is often referred to as Top-Down. This includes things like; mindfulness practices, cognitive behavioral therapy techniques, and other mindset reframing tactics.
This Top-Down approach is vital to a well-balanced program but mastering these alone won’t be enough to prevent the occasional nervous system hijack.
When our nervous system becomes hijacked and massive amounts of neurotransmitters are coursing through our veins we need something other than dropping into a meditation to pull us out of the panic into a more desirable state.
In these moments we need to embrace a Bottom-Up approach. This includes things like; breathwork, somatic movement, and other vagal tone inducing tactics.
Bottom-Up practices give us the ability to snap out of it right now. These tactics empower us to leverage all of those afferent neurons to help us self-regulate and positively change our internal state in real time.
The Stories We Tell
The stories we tell ourselves and the perspectives we share are both a function of our state and an influencer of our state.
Failing to realize and appreciate this interplay is sure fire way to languish for a long time.
Reactive storytelling always exacerbates our problems! It always leaves a negative impression.
You may not have any experience coaching pee wee football, but you’ve certainly found yourself in a similar situation.
A situation where you found it increasingly challenging to think clearly. A situation where nervous energy was growing uncontrollably.
How did you respond? What stories did you tell yourself about the situation?
In my case, a story about myself might have been:
“I must not be a very good coach if I can’t keep my team poised during high stakes situations.”
A story about my players might have been:
“They’re not mature enough for these moments.”
However, a new narrative arises, when we acknowledge that our state is not a reflection of who we are, it's merely a reflection of how we’re perceiving our current situation.
By intervening at the level of our physiology we flip the script.
Challenges that appeared to be too much suddenly become manageable.
What changed? You’re state!
Are you really not very good at that thing? Or do you just need to find a way to self-regulate so you can perform up to your full potential?
Stop letting your state direct your story.
You’re the author of your story.
Set the plot to your liking and then start to evoke the states that align with the story you’re trying to tell.